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though christmas has always been my favorite holiday (and favorite season-slash-time-of-year in general!), it's felt like as i've gotten older i've paid less and less attention to its coming. i remember being a kid and always going out with my parents to see all the lights, running around in malls and not even buying anything... just to see all the sights! seeing christmas movies on TV, preparing for the season around the home and at school—whatever! but these days, whether it's just because i'm older and my parents feel less of a need to put on a performance, i'm not in school anymore, malls don't really exist anymore, cable TV isn't something anyone does anymore (meaning i now have to go out of my way to search for christmas movies) or because i just don't have anyone to gift shop for (or who gift shops for me), it's just something i don't notice until the eve-of and day-of roll around and i suddenly have to go spend time with family

of course, not that i don't still love the season and spending time with my family and hearing the music on the radio and seeing what lights i do still see! it just happens that it's beennnn... de-emphasized. i don't think that's because ~harrumph old now depressed now christmas sad~ or because ~humbug christmas isn't what it used to be~ or whatever folks say these days—i think it's just because i'm in a different place in life that just happens to have a bit less christmas in it

that is to say... if i had a car, i would absolutely still be driving around and experiencing all the light shows. like this one my parents and i used to drive through... of course i can't remember what it's called or where it's at at this point, but that's where i would go if i was able


ironically, though, i don't care much for the new year. i don't do resolutions, i don't do "new year new me" or whatever... i think it's kinda dumb. self-improvement doesn't need to wait for the new year to start, and if you're waiting for the new year to do it, you're just gonna try forcing yourself and it's not gonna stick because the new year is over as soon as january 2nd rolls around. plus, i don't like feeling like i'm "starting over" or "getting a new beginning" or whatever—life has been pretty good for me recently and (both as a certified autist and as someone who is currently rather happy in life) i think i'd like everything to just stay the same! so for 2026, i am hoping that my life specifically stays mostly the same, and that the state of the world can get it together. like yeah, every time i say that 2025 was a pretty decent year for me, someone comes out of the woodwork to tell me how bad the state of the world was (and is) and how that made it a terrible year, but... i guess i've just had far worse years in my life and 2025 was so much better than those that i'm not letting the state of the world hit me too hard

yeah, it's bad out there. but why let that stop us from being happy? the new year isn't going to fix all that. all you can do is focus on yourself. keep it small, in my opinion, and it'll feel much better

so happy 2026, friends! may you find that the good doesn't change and the bad quietly fades away!

the fireworks scene skyrocketed shauna to the top of my list, personally—though this opinion is formed on the basis of somewhat hazy memories of playing this game last a few years ago by now

i never really considered my opinions using their teams—tierno i just remember as being the Big Guy Who Dances and have a very hard time remembering him for anything else. i think that hurts his character, honestly. and trevor i only remember as being The Short One. maybe he was a bit of a nerd? or maybe i'm remembering that just based on his design. definitely the one i cared about the least out of the whole gang—at least the Obvious Battle Rival stuck around in my mind a bit more because they're the other player character

i still remember generally liking the friends in XY, but their memory rests hazy in my mind... all except shauna. perhaps it's just shauna that i actually like, and also the battle theme

almost my entire life takes place on the internet

is that a bad thing? i think some of the older generation would probably say it is. i think a lot of folks would say it is. however, i don't really see it as a bad thing

i work from home, so i make money on the computer. i wake up in the morning, and i sit at my desk and do work on the computer. i've made friends on the computer—when i'm done with work, i talk to my friends on discord and hang out and play games. i share things i've made on the internet, i see things others have made on the internet, i learn about what's happening on the internet, i wouldn't be who i am if not for the internet!

on the internet, nobody knows you're not whatever you want to be! being autistic i think influences my opinions on it a significant amount—being out there in the "real world" means i have to look a certain way, act a certain way, be a certain someone... but here, i can just block anybody who doesn't like the way that i am

it is incredibly cliché to say "i can be myself on the internet," but it's true to the highest extent when it comes to the internet, i think. i've found my community on the internet! when folks can come together because of shared interests or shared personality traits or just a shared choice to be somewhere instead of the happenstance of going to the same school, working together, living in the same town... i think it's much easier to get along and to form lasting friendships

that's not to say i only exist on the internet, of course. i'm writing this as i wait for bible study in the garden in a half hour, i'm going to go to a friend's house for a movie night after that—but it is to say that the internet has brought a lot of value to my life

so the internet couldn't possibly be fatiguing for me! for me, the internet is the same thing as the outside world—to be tired of that would be to be tired of life! but my life's only just started!

if anything, i think the length of time that the internet has been around has given us plenty more to discover these days. i'd never have discovered this place if it wasn't for the internet guiding me here. a youtube video showing up on the recommended page of someone who lives on the other side of the country, who sent that video to me, and it just happened to be a video of someone reading off old name rater reviews...

Probably as simple as "people still make things I like on here, regardless of how often they actually upload".

this helps! i like to see things i like, and the internet is the easiest way to find that without having to get dressed, walk outside, and find it

of course... a good ad blocker is necessary. but so are clothes if you want to go exploring outside... and you have to change those every day, huh?

_{edit: used backslashes instead of forward slashes to close my italic tags... too html-brained}

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 pretty much all of my favorite pokémon of any given category at this point are almost always influenced by what i like to call Personal Reasons™, but that essentially just boils down to me having a soft spot for one specific instance of a pokémon. however, due to the nothingburger nature that all the explanations would be at that rate, i'll be trying to come up with better reasons for why i chose the ones i did!

i'll do you one better and make one of them grids

it has been quite some time since i've done a grid like that! i have one here from a year ago, though it'd definitely look decently different if i did it these days:
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_{attempted to spoiler this, though i don't think spoilers are displaying for me, anyway}

my favorite pokémon seem to change frequently, and every time they do change, my theriotype usually changes with it—not to mention every single time they change, the feeling is so strong that i could Never admit to liking anything else, until a new favorite comes along. of course, right now, you can probably tell what my favorite is. so all of these will be listed with the tinge of "for now"!

normal: furret! an ultimate classic, one that everybody and their mother loves, and the pokémon responsible for the kickstart of a certain silly gimmick blog on tumblr! i replaced my starter in hgss with a furret, and i think its popularity is a hundred percent warranted

fire: vulpix! ever since i was one of these in pmdeos, it's had my heart. i've found that in the small clips of the anime that i've seen, they always seem to show up in the background—so now my mind always takes note of Background Vulpix. it's cute (as is my reasoning for most of my picks), has lots of tails, and i love the curly hair!

water: lapras! the boat pokémon. of course, in both pmdeos and psmd, they are our boats—but i think the story of them being endangered in earlier games, all the way up to being overpopulated due to conservation efforts in later games is such an endearing sequence. i would love to ride on the back of one of these things

grass: skiddo! another car pokémon! i never really looked at this thing and said "yep. car" until i realized its japanese name is basically baa-vehicle. but i just think that's so profoundly funny that it made me like it even more. it's a goat, which is awesome. it's cute. check. someone on tumblr once told me a ""fun fact"" that skiddo is "one of the only pokémon with horns," but i don't know what they mean because i feel like there's tons of pokémon with horns? but also every time you see folks riding them, they're using the horns like a bike. it's so funny. this goat was just meant to be a motorcycle. why is it like that

electric: jolteon! it's just cute, really. i may be guilty of having reserved a dex-sized jolteon plush. just a little. it's so spiky. i just really love the way this thing Looks. i'm rather attached to it at the moment, as you can probably see. gender envy!

ice: alolan vulpix! i already like vulpix, so it's a bit of a no-brainer! glaceon is tied for this spot—i like pokémon that are just Little Guys. just little Creatures. alolan vulpix is everything that's great about vulpix, but with pretty white fur, frilly hair and tails, and a more... _chill... vibe! sort of a magical girl type of creature. gender envy... but the opposite kind! glaceon... i love the rock on its head. it must be so heavy. girl. your neck. is it okay

fighting: mienshao! weasel thing. fun-shaped guy. very long body and the floppy sleeves. as a long-sleeve wearer myself who absolutely refuses to wear short sleeves under any circumstances, i relate heavily

poison: toxtricity! it's just awesome, really. a rockstar pokémon with two different vibes to fit the situation? man. i'd love to chill with a toxtricity. it probably helps that i love to make music!

ground: flygon! i don't like most ground-types, so when i find one that i do like, it's a bit of an occasion. this applies to the trapinch line, the sandile line, and the sandshrew line, off the top of my head. flygon is a very huggable type beast, i think! the great stats help—but the horrid level-up move pool in gen 3 is not helping it at all. much more usable in gen 9

flying: fletchinder! yes, specifically the middle evo. i'm attached to it for more specific reasons, but i think this line as a whole was when regional birds finally got Good. up 'til this point, they'd all just been normal/flying, but the fletchling line really paved the way for more interesting regional birds like corviknight and kilowattrel

psychic: reuniclus! i have a shiny reuniclus in sv who carried me through the blueberry elite four with trick room. i think it's so nifty. who put a baby in all that goop and why is it blowing everything up and tossing chairs across the room with its mind

bug: vivillon! all the forms are a fun plus (even if they're generally a pain to collect), but i'm attached to this one because it was my first random full-odds shiny in gen 9! when i was in suuuper early game, right outside of the second town you go to (los platos, i believe?), i happened to be running around and saw a white scatterbug. of course, he quickly replaced my starter, despite his less-than-stellar stats, and became my mainstay for the whole game. shoutouts to you, zanni

rock: lycanroc! just like ground-type, finding a rock-type that i like is a miracle. lycanroc is just a dog, and midnight form is just a furry, and that's just about the best you're gonna get with me. though it also happens to be quite a good pick all around. awesome goth emo dog

ghost: sableye! if i'm to be true to my heart here. i've loved sableye since i was a kid—when i finally deleted my old childhood save in pokémon sapphire, it seemed that kid-me was trying to replace my starter with a sableye. somethin about the funky purple guy who eats rocks and had no weaknesses until gen 6. pmdeos probably didn't help

dragon: goodra! a dragon thing made of slime who wants to give you a hug?? yes please! i would hug it! i would be all slimy afterwards but it would be worth it, i think

dark: zorua! this one's always held a special place in my heart, but illusion is very cool, it's cute, and it's a mischievous little thang who loves to pull pranks. what's not to love?

steel: corviknight! it's cool. probably tied is aegislash, who was a mainstay on my gen 8 team and is also a sentient sword and shield. literally made for that game

fairy: primarina! gender envy! i love love LOVE how this thing is 87.5% male. i LOVE IT!! that's my FAVORITE thing about this pokémon. female primarina basically don't even exist to me

...oh! that's the end!

wow that took a long time I think I've been making this post for like an hour all included (grid, typing, clicking post), but it's always fun to do this kinda thing so why not

you were not kidding!

Water: Gastrodon

best pick out of all of yours, i think. gastrodon is a wonderful little thing that i need to shiny hunt one of these days

Fairy: Florges
Specifically the blue-color one ...

i really like the white one! it makes it feel more cohesive as a pokémon, to me, and there's something about white flowers that just feel... unnatural and slightly uncanny to me in a way that makes it feel very awesome when a pokémon that's designed around holding-and-looking-like a flower simulates that

Fighting: Hariyama

when i was a little baby child, makuhita was my favorite pokémon, and i thought hariyama was the worst for replacing my belovèd makuhita. i don't know why i was like this, and i think hariyama is a fun pick these days, but thinking about it always reminds me of that


while my favorites do bounce around a lot, the pokémon that i favorite at some point always remain in my heart as guys that i at least Like A Lot once they stop being my favorites. at some point i'll probably go through and favorite the whole dex and then eventually every pokémon will be my favorite

yeah unfortunately 39 of them are Google Spiders documenting the webpage for Our Overlords, if I remember the explanation correctly from like 15 years ago lol, pretty unfortunate but people just don't really wanna engage with forums much anymore, or if they do, they're "Happy Enough" with Reddit

i don't feel like reddit even really counts as a "forum," but the more that i think about it, the more that that idea just comes down to "it doesn't really evoke the Feeling of forums," which unfortunately doesn't really mean anything from a logical standpoint. however, if we toss logic out the window for a moment, i still feel like it applies! not to mention reddit has perhaps one of the worst communities on the internet from what i've seen. though i suppose that's where the "Enough" part of "Happy Enough" comes from

i don't know which captcha we have these days, but if it's the sign-up one, that's because we get a lot of spam bots lol

i think the sign-up one and the one for making a post are the same—for some reason it just took me a solid three tries on the captcha to actually get that post posted. though i also suppose folks are training AI to do captchas these days anyway

if it makes you feel less scared there's only like, 15 of us that post with any regularity, so don't be too shy! it's fine to just join and not post too

i'll Think about it. i'll Maybe Consider it. it certainly feels more personal—i guess to me it feels less Discussion focused and more Chat focused. which i guess isn't necessarily a directly bad thing, but it's sort of a gamble—on forums like this one, the topic tends to be a bit more focused, but in a discord server, you could run into any sort of folks—and "any sort of folks" can be a little iffy, sometimes!
perhaps i'm just going based off of somewhat negative experiences i've had in the past. i'll think about it..!

hello, hello! i may be a little young to ever have truly engaged with the forum structure of the internet when i was a kid (perhaps i browsed a few forums and made a few posts in roleplay threads _{that were instantly deleted, because i was a little too young to understand what was going on}), but i've certainly found myself fascinated with them and their structure for a while now!

i've also been historically incredibly interested with places that seem "abandoned" or contain a lot of remnants of recent history. i peeked into this place and, based on the aesthetic of the website and the not-so-up-to-date "games" page to the left, i had assumed it was long gone... only to pop into the forums and find signs of life! since i was already interested, that drove me to also jump in and smell the roses!

i've, of course, got a discord just like everybody else... but big servers freak me out, and i have a bad habit of joining servers and then never speaking in them

as someone who first ever discovered that this website existed like two days ago, i'm so glad to see that it's still here, and that i'm even able to make a post in the first place. i even remember 40-something folks being online when i found it (and 40ish online right now, though i'm the only one with an account!)... and with the amount of folks on tumblr who are still passing around blinkies and stamps, and with the resurgence of sites like neocities, i think there's clearly a desire for an "old internet" to still stick around

in other words... i'm happy to see that this site is still here (even though this is my first time around), and i'm glad that its life intersected with mine! and hello to everyone who's just as new as i am, and hello to everyone who's been around for ages!

_{also, is it just me, or are the captchas here actually really hard}