...but then...

[Captain Jigglypuff]

A helicopter crashed through the window and destroyed your entire office. On the plus side your insurance pay out is over $1000000!

I was eating a taco....

[SirBlaziken]

You figured out that I don't have a job, so I walk away millions richer!

I waste my time on this site, but then....

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Your laptop decides it has enough of you, gets up, and leaves taking your million dollars! :0

I was drinking some coffee....

[SirBlaziken]

But then it wasn't coffee.....

I was drinking hot tang (it's like a powder for an orange drink. Can be made hot or cold. Quite good), but then....

[Captain Jigglypuff]

You accidentally mixed it with some acid by mistake and you burn a hole in your throat.

I was petting a Soft Kitty....

[SirBlaziken]

Then it wasn't a kitty.....

I was watching family guy....

[Delicious_Scout]

... but then it appeared to be Family Gay.

I was watching Family Gay, but then...

[SirBlaziken]

Then it appeared to be family guy.

I was reusing a rebuttal, but then....

[Captain Jigglypuff]

A meteor struck you down!

I was eating sushi....

[SirBlaziken]

But you got mercury poisoning!

I was doing something completely pointless, but then...

[E.C.A.M.B.S.]

You were in Soviet Russia so something pointless did YOU!

I was trying to get my homework done, but then...

[Delicious_Scout]

... I appeared and forced you to have fun.

ShinyBlaziken was watching "Attack on Titan", but then a Titan appeared out of TV, but then...

[E.C.A.M.B.S.]

Its head emerged from the TV and fell on the floor and crashed the entire house down. Mikasa had killed it, its body had fallen out of the TV.

I was waiting for Saturday to watch the next dubbed episode of Attack on Titan, but then..

[Delicious_Scout]

... "Attack on Titan" was suspended; instead, a new season of "King of the Hill" was released.

I was selling propane and propane accessories, but then...

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Your son who YOU tried to force to be EXACTLY like you in every pathetic way, stabs you to death with a barbecue tong because he finally snapped after you took away the ONE thing that made him his own person. He then sliced you up and cooked you on a grill. That's what you get for being so absorbed in yourself and not caring about letting your own son be his own identity! PS Peggy said at your funeral that she only stayed with you because of the boy you said "just ain't right."

I was writing a story....