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life is stressful again
I'm coming to the end of my First Real Job next month and need to start looking for a new one but I can't decide what I wanna do with my life. I've been in this nice lil happy bubble for the past year and now it's going to pop.
part of me wants to go back and do a masters in something design related but another part just wants to get a job and keep climbing that ladder!!
The problem is my self esteem/confidence etc etc is awful just now so it's putting me off even applying for anything in the first place 🙃
like on the plus side I've designed so much in the past year and def have enough to fill and revamp my portfolio, it's just... fear I guess???

anyways I'd forgotten I was still even on this site and haven't posted for like 2 years

Re train chat 90% of the time I was travelling long distance with Scotrail (I.e Edinburgh -> Inverness or in reverse) something always went wrong or there would be some sort of delay somewhere along the line. I think the best was leaving Edinburgh at 4pm and not actually reaching Inverness until about 10.30pm (usually takes around 3 and a half hours).
Now I kinda miss the trains cause the only form of public transport here is a passable bus service, being used to Edinburgh buses has spoiled me lmao

^ never tried the pizza and kebab ones but I really miss the southern fried chicken ones

Also on the subject of gov banning chemicals Robinson's have changed their diluting juice and it tastes awful now, they've actually took the real sugar out and gone all artificial??? I'll need to stock up on the ones with the blue lids lmao 

Anyway my current pressing problem is that I won't have internet in my new house until like Thursday and I know I'm prob going to use all my data by then and it only renewed today sooooo

Trying to find a flat here is Painful:
first one was basically like a crack den compared to the pics - they actually made it worse??
second was nice and prob my no 1 choice just now but the landlord seemed a bit of Work
third wasn't even where the location said it was so didn't even view it

Going to view one more tomorrow which is only 'partially furnished' so fingers crossed it won't be too partial lmao. Like I could get an unfurnished quite easily but my job is only for a year initially so not really sure if it's worth it. It doesn't help that there isn't even that many options here either.

Fingers crossed I get something!!

I've been ignoring my once called best friend now for the past week or so which is incredibly petty but they've turned into the Worst person since they went away to uni again this past year. Kinda hurts after so long but I've been tired of being treated like a doormat so *shrug*

I asked them to do the most basic favour ever: Skype me for like 2 mins to test it out on my new laptop cause I had an upcoming interview with it. They were too ~busy~. I'm guessing in their mind they think it was due to that One Thing but it's just been a slow culmination of crappy things they've said/done over the past few months.

It's just frustrating realising the things you thought about them years ago are actually true. There's only so much selfishness, flakiness, and drama I can put up with! If they want to still be friends then they have to make an effort but I guess they won't so I'll continue to be Petty too

(I know this is a 16 year old high school drama type post but this is the only place online I can really vent without them seeing lmao)

Was a bit of a weird Christmas this year cause I didn't really need or want anything in particular lmao. My fav presents were prob my fav perfume, mario kart 8 for switch, and some new boots. Got a pokemon notebook as well which was cool! Biggest surprise was from my grandparents, they made us up huge hampers - one with sweets and snacks and another full of housey things for everyone which was such a nice idea.

It was a nice stress free Christmas though, first one since starting college 4 years ago that I've not worried about deadlines.

Hope you guys all had a good one! 🎄

[Software I use]

So I thought I'd ask the good people of pkmn for some laptop advice (again)!

So basically I've finished uni now but I don't really know what the next few years will bring! I need something that will ideally last another 3-4 years.
I would class myself as a designer but not Pro yet I guess? By that I mean I don't need some bleeding edge thing with eye watering specs and pricing to match lmao.
While at uni I used it for design work, so graphic design stuff on illustrator, a little video editing, prototyping etc. My needs haven't changed /that/ much but still need something Powerful.

My current one is showing its age now but it served me well at college and uni. It's a 15.6' 2013 Samsung with i5 and 6gb of ram. It ran all of the stuff I needed to but could get quite slow when processing huge files.

So I've looked a few things up but just not that sure in what to go for. I'm not too fussed if it's Mac or Windows. Mac would be nice as it integrates with my iPad Pro but it's a lot more money. I've been looking into the 2015 pro but wondering is it worth buying a 2 year old machine at this point?
Windows is what I'm used to but getting frustrated with it now (although that's prob down to my laptop lmao). A lot of Windows seem to be 2in1s - I use my iPad for art now and I've heard the styluses aren't as great on some of them. Was looking into Wacom cintiqs but I think a traditional laptop would be better for me tbh.

Software I use:
[bold equals use a lot/italics occasionally]

• Illustrator
• InDesign
• Premiere Pro (nothing too extreme, like I can't see myself making 4K)
• After Effects (same as above but I'd like to do a little more)
• Ms Office (mostly Word/PowerPoint)
• Unity (want to do more in it)
• Paint tool sai
• Steam (very easy to run games lmao)
• Arduino and Processing

Requirements

• I'm a little bit of an #aesthetic person so I'd like something that looks nice too. I'm sure gaming laptops would be fine but some just look too Edgy etc so I'd like something that looks Nice.
• Nothing too bulky
• I don't really want a 2in1 or a desktop either - lack of space for the latter just now.
• It needs ports!! USB/SD/HDMI are what I use most
• 15' screen - preferably a nice resolution etc. I'm open to 13' models with the possibility of getting a monitor later on.
• Something that runs the above comfortably.

So I have a couple of questions as well:
1- Am I better off going for an i7 processor over an i5? Would I notice a difference even if I picked a current gen i5?

2- So with RAM is this where I should spend a little bit more? Like would it be silly to have an i5 and 16gb? Or should I be going as powerful as I can afford?

~

Thanks for reading my rambles, if anyone has suggestions/advice it would be much appreciated!

If it's in game and before generation 6 (X&Y) then only male Pokemon can pass on egg moves. The baby Dratini would learn Flamethrower and Fire blast before gen 6 as they're both tm moves it can learn anyway.

After gen 6 female Pokemon can pass on egg moves. Dratini can learn the first 3 of Dragonite's moves naturally and/or through TMs so I'm assuming it would be a mixture of both parents?

If it's for fanfiction or whatever then just go as wild as you want with the moves or not I guess.

My laptop is on its last legs so I've been thinking about getting something to replace it but I don't know what to get!!!!
I haven't used it since I finished uni because it's so slow and cumbersome compared to my iPad, it's what 4 years old? Basically I use my iPad Pro for like 80% of anything I used to do on my laptop besides from illustrator and unity stuff. I actually did all of my artwork for my final major project at uni on it and I don't think I could go back to using a slate Wacom (unless it was a cintiq lol).

So that made me think about getting a desktop but I dunno what next year will bring ie if I'm going to move/go back to uni etc. I need something relatively Powerful and future proof which = ££££.
Also the whole windows vs Mac thing. Most windows laptops now are 2in1 things which i don't see the point in getting because: iPad. Some of the powerful ~gaming~ ones just don't look nice which leads me to a Mac but it's so much goddamn money. It's so frustrating aaaa

soz im super late 2 this (brain bein a butthead) but you hear anything further from the docs yet are all they still playin silly billies about it? IANAD but not rly seein their reasonin behind "well we just dont wanna do anything about it for 3 months" or w/e and i dont wonder if its one of those Things where you have to get a bit mardy at them about it for them to do anything

Tl;dr yes they are being silly billies!

Ended up at the hospital again last week with a different consultant this time, was noticing a shadow in my peripheral vision and the optician said to pack a bag in case I was going to be kept in (was feeling hopeful about this). Consultant said that it's definitely been there a long time, there was scarring and pigmentation(?). He really just said that because I've learned about it recently I'm prob much more aware of it than I was before.

He was incredibly reluctant to operate as well, as it might cause me problems further down the line w cataracts and things. Even if he does it'll just stop it from spreading and won't get me back any vision I've lost. So they're not doing anything just now because it's 'stable and long standing' which is annoying.

He's going to compare notes with the other consultant and if he's noticed any differences then I'll get a letter within a few weeks but if not it's a wait until November!! Props to him though he was v through and had actually read through my notes (I have 4 humongous bundles lmao). Apparently I won't lose my sight so??? I think come November I'll just get fobbed off tbh.

He said if I notice changes to go back to the opticians again, but I feel like I'm being a Pain by doing this now ugh. Thankfully my optician is lovely and knows my history so it's a plus I guess. The really fun thing is I had no idea that my eyes being the way they are that I was predisposed to it anyway, like no one had ever told me? So thanks for that I guess!

So I saw a consultant at the hospital yesterday and apparently my retina has been detached for at least 6 months but because I've not really noticed it until now they want me to wait another 3 months 🙃 Going to be fun waking up every day thinking 'will I go blind today?'
He was reluctant to operate cause of my previous operation on my eye and because I'm so shortsighted. Just angry and annoyed at the terrible hand of cards I've been dealt in general ugh

I was wondering how your brain ignores an eye? That is a very odd thing to read about.

When I was younger I had a squint eye, so to prevent double vision my brain tried to block any signals coming from the squint eye - making it become 'lazy.' So I essentially use one eye to see with. I can see with my lazy eye but I'm not consciously aware of it. I have peripheral vision with it but if I was to close/cover my other eye then I would be more aware of it. It's a little weird to explain I guess but hope that clears it up a little!

Went for a routine eye test only to find that my retina is starting to detach 🙃

Never noticed any of the symptoms cause it's in my right eye which my brain ignores 99% of the time so. I thought he was just being very thorough with it but he looked with the little lamp thing and was like 'are you sure you're not seeing floaters?' and then proceeded to look again and was like 'yeah I'm going to have to phone the hospital.' Thankfully if it was bad I would have probably got seen to yesterday but I've to wait until next week for a letter. Means another operation though most likely

Was most likely due to my high shortsightedness in both eyes (-10 and -12) - so if any of you guys have terrible eyes like mine then get them checked regularly or see your dr/optician if you notice anything changing!!

Gotta love when your friend calls you and waits for you to finish talking so they can spend 80% of the phone call talking about themselves, like why did you even want to phone if you were just going to do that???
I mentioned that I'm probably going to have a party (I use that pretty loosely lol) when I come home. "Oh I can't come." Like not even asking when it would be or whatever. Like it's fine you don't want to celebrate your best friend finishing uni, totally fine

I'm honestly glad I live in Scotland tbh. May just seems to be royally messing everything up, seems to be taking too much inspiration from Thatcher lmao. Not saying the snp are perfect by any stretch of the imagination but still. Idk if I was in England I would go for Corbyn?