Make a Wish. Have it horribly corrupted.

[Alexi: Crazier by the Day]

Granted, but you go crazy with spending, can't pay the bill, and lose your house. Yeah. Stuff like this happens.

I wish I was never bored. Ever.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. You are dead and thus can NEVER get bored!

I wish I could get my friend to like me in THAT way!

[AlexanM2]

Granted but they become obsessed with you... forcing you to move to Mars and change your name to Gertrude....

I wish I understood Kingdom Hearts.

[lugia95]

Granted, but what you learn makes you hate the game series. (And I know what you mean - it's incredibly complicated.)

I wish all my future wishes are un-corruptable.

[Alexi: Crazier by the Day]

(agreed 100% with the kingdom hearts thing)

Granted. But you wish for all your future wishes to be un-corruptible does not include that wish, so it becomes corrupted and therefore allows for your future wishes to become corruptible as well.

(tell me if you understood that, 'cause I sure didn't)

I wish I had unlimited monies.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. You get countless of "Pokemon-Ponies" or "Monies!" Oh and they're ALL half Magikarp!

I wish for a special friend!

[Uncle Garnetto]

Granted, but then the men in white coats take you and your "special friend" into an asylum.
I wish I had a bag of Doritos.

[lugia95]

Granted. The bag is big, but only has one dorito in it.

I wish for this wish, along with every future wish I make to be uncorruptable.

[spritey]

Granted. But that goes against the rules of this topic. So Hicky, the maker of this topic, reports you to the moderator. Apparently, Joeno is in a very, very bad mood at the time and you are banned.

I wish that people's wishes weren't that easy to corrupt.

[lugia95]

Granted. Their now almost impossible to corrupt, so the topic dies. Then Hicky realises that the topic he created died due to you, so kills you.

I wish I new what I was going to do at the end of next year.

[spritey]

Granted. Now that you know what happens you have the tendency to change it. It goes wrong. You're dead.

I wish I could make all your lives 100x better.

[Uncle Garnetto]

Granted, but each person whose life you make better makes your life 100x worse
... I wish tonight new family guy(screams of silence:the story of suzie q)wasnt an awful episode. Which it was

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. Then you realize it was a repeat and that the season ended LAST week!

I wish I could get a credit card!

[spritey]

Granted. You get a credit card. It gets caught under an RFID scanner. You experience Identity Theft.

I wish I had lobster bisque.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. You get a lobster. It's made of bisque procelain....

I wish Natalie Portman would sponanteously combust!