Make a Wish. Have it horribly corrupted.

[SirBlaziken]

(Stop making references!)

Fine. The glasses are lined with spikes, that keep jabbing you in the face.

I wish for tickets to the super bowl!

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted! You get to see the world's largest bowl!

I wish I was a red porcupine with dandruff!

[SirBlaziken]

Granted, but you can no longer make references.

I wish I wasn't such a wuss

[Hitmonchu]

Granted, but you are now so fearless that you have the urge to skateboard down a cliff on a cardboard box.

I wish for some sweet tea that isn't poisonous and doesn't have any gross stuff in it.

[Meowstic Royalty]

Granted. It's drops and smashes.

I wish for my favorite TV show to come back!

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. But its revival makes the so SO horrible that it is cancelled literally two seconds after it returns and is aired and anyone who even mentions it is legally arrested and beaten to death by a rabid weasel tied to a stick.

I wish I had a Wind Waker special edition Wii U!

[NTN]

Granted, but I eat it.

I wish CJ would stop unnecessarily emphasizing words by putting them in all CAPS.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. Now I type like this!!!!

I wish for a corndog!

[Wolstenholme]

Granted but it is literally dog meat and you don't know.


I wish I had remembered to take my copy of Shakespeare's The Twelfth Night out of my locker to bring home yesterday.

[NTN]

Granted.

I wish for nothing at all.

[Wolstenholme]

Not granted, you get me corrupting your wish! 


I wish I would win Mark's Spriting Contest at least once.

[quack98]

Granted, but that makes me not win and so I stop talking to you 

I wish I could sprite well

[NTN]

Granted, but I eat you and crap you out in a dimension where you can never sprite well.

I wish for toilet paper after crapping Dick out.

[Wolstenholme]

Granted but it's rough and scratchy!


I wish that Dick was not a crap.... he already smells!

[quack98]

Granted, but instead I'm my usual self

I wish for Nate to be nicer