Make a Wish. Have it horribly corrupted.

[Spriter]

Granted; a nerd gets the reference who then beats you with a crowbar to death for breaching copyright laws.

I wish I was No.1 on Pokemon Online...

[Nightmare Eater]

Granted but ranks go the other way, so now your last.

I wish for an explosion that destroys my worst enemy's house without me involved at all.

[Skarmory8]

Granted but the council makes him move to your house instead. He kills you with a chainsaw.
I wish to know the meaning of life.

[OranBerrySandvich]

Granted. You find out it's only 42. You're so dissapointed that life is basically pointless you kill yourself. You die.

I wish for a load more time for me on holidays.

[spritey]

Granted but you do super hard work during the extra time. You break your spine and each of your fingers. You try to walk to the hospital. You trip while you're on the street. You get run over by a car. You die.

I wish for ice cream.

[Sizacu]

Granted, but it's melted ice cream.

I wish for a Sim to randomly pop out of the computer and start going rabid with a chainsaw in one hand and an axe in the other.

[Dracoandy666]

Granted, but they start to attack your family first.

I wish to have a pet dragon ^^

[OranBerrySandvich]

Granted. You are now your own pet. This somehow causes a paradox. Our reality implodes. We die.
Thanks a lot, genius.

I wish that Wikipedia's information is 100% accurate, reliable and unchangable unless it is to support the first two.

[Mr.Mewtwo]

Granted. Wikipedia is now 0% accurate, unreliable and changable unless you are telling the truth.Sorry,did I just derp there?

I wish for something.

[Nightmare Eater]

Granted. Here is an evil Dragonite nicknamed something. He is extremely hungry and requires the flesh of his owner so he doesn't destroy his owner outright. And never derp around him.

I wish everyone had an evil Dragonite except me because I have the only tamed evil Dragonite. Oh and this tamed one is 100 stronger than anything.

[Skarmory8]

Granted but the tamed evil dragonite is still evil. It blows up your car "by accident".
I wish for a steadier hand.

[ScottishFoldLover]

Granted, but now your feet/legs aren't very steady so when you try to walk you're always falling down.

I wish for some hot wings.

[Skarmory8]

Granted but I misread it so now you have a pair of flaming wings extending from your back. You are burnt to death.

I wish for a ninja mask!

[Dracoandy666]

Granted, but the ninja mask cuts off your airways and you suffocate.

I wish for Jam roly poly

[Hicky]

Granted, but you get some of it on your new suit and you're on the way to a job interview, and as a result don't get the job that you wanted.

I wish for redemption, serenity, world peace, and world harmony.