Funny stories your parents have told you

[Petzbreeder]

Have your parents ever told you stories of funny things that happened to them when they were younger?

A few days ago, my mum asked me to look up the theme song to a tv show called Rawhide that she used to watch. My dad came in and told me that when he was younger, he was confused by the lyrics of the song.

The theme song says "Keep them dogies movin" (Dogies = Cattle) which my dad misheard as "Keep them doggies movin" (Doggies = Dogs)
My dad apparently used to ask "Well, where are they then?"

I had a good laugh at that for a while!

[SirBlaziken]

This gem happened just this Monday between my Brother and his psychiatrist.

Psy: Do you hear voices in your head?
G: They're telling me to say no.

Best part is she started to write it down until she realized what he said.

[Kpyna]

the story of how my dad learned he was related to an illegal is pretty funny... when he was like 20 he was driving through boston with his father and my grandfather points to a river coming into a bay and tells him, "that's where your grandfather jumped to get off the boat from poland" and my dad knew his grandfather was a polish immigrant but didn't think he was an illegal until that moment. my dad was pretty mad at my grandfather for not telling him about it sooner, but my grandfather explained that my great grandfather spent pretty much his entire life dodging the IRS and trying not to get deported so I guess him being an illegal was kinda a taboo subject to talk about...

[sylar]

my dad was almost in the fratellis as a drummer but couldnt do it because of the divorce between him and my mum which was caused by having no money because they didnt expect me to be born LOL

[not chloe]

When my Dad was little you could change the plug fittings on the edge of cable but it was like really advanced re-wiring but because my Grandad liked technology he'd already taught my Dad how to re-wire a plug at six years old.

So my Dad goes to his friend's house to play (@ six y-o) and they wanted to play that board game with the little electric horses that move around the track (think it begins with a 't' or something, it's a really vintage game) but it requires a plug and the one attached to the game boar was faulty so my Dad just decided that the right thing to do would be to take the plug off of his friend's Mum's Hoover and re-wire it onto the game board and it worked but then the kid's Mum got home and was just so confused about why she couldn't Hoover and the kid was like "oh Martin just re-wired the plug from the Hoover so we could play [game]. He wasn't invited back to their house.

[Kpyna]

my dad was almost in the fratellis as a drummer but couldnt do it because of the divorce between him and my mum which was caused by having no money because they didnt expect me to be born LOL

that's insane! the fratellis are one of my favorite bands

[sylar]

that's insane! the fratellis are one of my favorite bands

yeah same
i love them so much i mentioned them to him and he told me that and i was like o-oh
hes pretty chill with the current drummer these days though and figures it wouldnt have worked out since hes just not into the band life at all but im still like damn thats... a lot to take in.


another less depressing one my dad told me though: he used to go through bins with his mates back when he was like 16-17 and one time he found an irn bru bottle with a liquid in it that wasnt orange like irn bru is. and his mates started chanting "DRINK IT DRINK IT DRINK IT" so he downed the whole thing and ended up in hospital for like a month because it turned out to be turps. they didnt think hed survive like at all because it practically burned a hole in his stomach but he was too stubborn to let it overcome him and managed to get through with little issue. what a guy.

one my mum told me: she met the guy who does river cottage, hugh fearnley-wittingstal, at some get together she went to with a friend of hers. my sister loved that show at the time. he was just being real casual and she was drunk and was like "my daughter has a massive crush on you mate" and he was like "oh. um. ok?" and my mum leaned in and went "but shes 15, so if you try anything funny ill gut you, farmboy" and winked at him and went on with her night. mum met my sisters idol at the time and threatened him like it was no big deal. loves it.

[Kpyna]

One time I was at a We the Kings and The Maine concert, back when they both were my favorite bands. I was 15, so my mom drove me in, and she was chilling in the bar and the singer of The Maine came over to her and started chatting her up and hitting on her. I was so mad she didn't try to get any free stuff or a signature or anything. Also mad he wasn't hitting on me.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

My great grandma and dad's parents are poisonous mushrooms and all this chaos ensued made even worse by none of them speaking English. My grandma blames great grandma for the incident and my great grandma kept hitting people in the hospital.

[BS]

Once upon a time I was born.

In all seriousness though. My dad (RIP) had this little gem of a story from when he was in commercial flooring.

>be roadie, driving from Canberra to Melbourne
>pull up at this roadstop in the middle of the Snowy Mountains
>workmate decides to buy a meat pie
>this pie doesn't even smell like its from Earth
>doesn't even take it out of bag
>shove it in the glovebox and keep driving
>go lay vinyl in this childcare centre being newly built
>third night on job, applying flammable glues to floor
>someone left pilot light on in kitchen
>entire building goes up in flames
>get outta there at like 5am
>well we sure screwed that one up, better go home
>drive back through road stop, remember four day old pie in glovebox
>workmate suddenly yells at dad to slow down
>winds down window, waits until shop door is open
>catapults rotten sack of filth into building
>hit the gas and floor it back to Canberra

tl;dr dad and his workmate purchase an inedible meat pie from a road stop, forget about it while their worksite catches on fire and when workmate is 500% done with life, throw it back through the front door of the shop as they drive home four days later

[The name master]

When my dad was young, he used to deliver milk (with his mate) and one day they came to deliver milk to this old (i think!) person. My dad say to his mate "chuck me a bottle!" So his mate threw it, and my dad was like "No! Not this time!" and stepped out of the way. The milk bottle smashed on the floor and milk was everywhere! They presumably had to clean it up! LOL!