Make a Wish. Have it horribly corrupted.

[Alexi: Crazier by the Day]

Granted. You draw horribly and everyone hates you.

I wish I had ANOTHER rose that never died.

[Spartacus]

Granted but by obtaining an object of such beauty you ar transformed into a grotesque beast.

I wish that someone woul pay my tax bill for me.

[Jarl ulfric stormcloak]

granted but they get mad and push you of a cliff!

I wish pokemon was real!

[THE ARBITER]

granted jiggalypuffs atack you

i wish for icecream that walks like a turtle

[Webby]

Granted, but because it walks so slowly, it melts before it can come into your possession.

I wish I did not need to eat food to survive.

[master1]

Granted. Now you need to eat poop to survive.

I wish someone would hug me.

[MOP]

Granted but while hugging you they die, rigor mortis sets in and they are stuck to you forever.

I wish for a Christmas romance with mistletoe and mulled wine in front of a log fire. 

[Alexi: Crazier by the Day]

And someone poisoned your wine, so you die. A minute later, the fireplace lights the house on fire and you are buned to ashes. Sorry

*Smells rose, then goes to mirror and uses magic to transform back to normal.*

I wish I was a pretty as my rose, WITHOUT becoming a rose.

[Webby]

Granted, the rose becomes you.

I wish I had a pet kitten. :3

[Apprentice]

Granted, but now you live in Soviet Russia.
Understand from there on...

I gratefully wish for a Yorkshire pattie.

[master1]

Granted. *gives you a cow pat from Yorkshire*

I wish for good luck. *drops coin in well*

Granted but while hugging you they die, rigor mortis sets in and they are stuck to you forever.

... No complaints here. X3

[Webby2]

I wish I had a pet kitten. :3

I like kittens =P

On topic now, granted, but that means you lose all ability. You only rely on luck, and it isn't perfect, so a lot of moments will go wrong.

I wish that HULK would play for Newcastle United =3

[Yugi24862]

But HULK destroys an opposition stadium and bankrupt Newcastle United

I wish  for the death of my motal enemies       

[Z:illyhoo]

Granted, but the families of your enemies become you enemies and it keeps going like a chain until you're the only person on Earth. Then you become your own mortal enemy and you die. <shrug>

I wish I had more pride.

[master1]

Granted. *turns you into a female lion and drops you in the African savannah*
=D

I wish there was something good on TV.