Make a Wish. Have it horribly corrupted.

[Kitt]

Granted. However you have only delayed the corruption, not stopped it.

I wish that I was a Gallade.

[Petzbreeder]

Granted, your trainer is really dumb though, and tries to use a gardevoirite to make you mega evolve.
Out of frustration, your trainer releases you into the wild. Where is the corruption? Your trainer, being dumb, releases you underwater - you drown!

I wish I could get this monster in Monster Rancher 2 and call it Clifford.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. But Clifford the Big Red Dog is not amused that you used his name and he bites you in half. Why? Because he's a giant dog!

I wish for a yoyo!

[Delicious_Scout]

Granted, but the yo-yo belonged to Snoop Dogg, hence it tends to act in a swaggie manner, with lots of #YOLOs. Eventually, it smokes weed everywhere, every day, and you become so stoned you turn into a statue.

I wish for a hat for Kaito.

[Meowstic Royalty]

Granted, but it's a fedora.

I wish for an army of skeletons.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. You get an army of sloth skeletons which are so lazy that while in battle, you end up dying because no one is moving fast enough to save you.

I wish I had bacon!

[Krowler88]

Granted....you get so much poisoned bacon and that's all you're allowed to eat for the rest of your short life.

I wish all 3 of the underground super-volcanoes in the earth would erupt to full extent at the same exact time.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. The volcanoes erupt at full force and cause massive destruction. Too bad it all happened directly beneath you and you were burned to a VERY long and painful death....

I wish I had a coffee cake!

[Delicious_Scout]

Granted. Godot sees the cake, smells it, and veours it, ramming his coffee mug to your head until he is done eating. You die in the process.

I wish I could learn how to Shoryuken.

[Sizacu]

Granted, but now all you can do to respond to questions is yell out 'Sure you can!' and then do an uppercut.

I wish for three perfectly cooked jacket potatoes.

[SirBlaziken]

Granted, but I eat them.

I wish that I can visit the worlds that I create in my dreams and actually play through the events, and be able to come home when I want.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. You then run into Freddy Krueger who then kills you in a horrible yet clever way. The police are still looking for parts of you in the real world.

I wish I had a peacock!

[SirBlaziken]

^Jokes of you, he doesn't exist in any of them!

Granted, but it kills you.

I wish that I could think of something to wish for.

[kindtocrows]

Granted, but it's a horrible idea and you never should have thought of it.

I wish I could actually get the motivation to do something.

[SirBlaziken]

Granted, but then you have nothing to do.

I wish I didn't have to read Pride and Prejudice