Make a Wish. Have it horribly corrupted.

[ShiraBliss]

Granted, but you only see the first few seconds before your TV goes ape-poop and all you see or hear is static

I wish kindness was universal.

[Awkward Squirtle]

Granted, but you are dead and can only watch it from heaven/hell

I wish that I succeed in spriting my made-up pokémon.

[Jarl ulfric stormcloak]

granted but i steal IT !!   
I wish my r.p would have a new post allready (allthough its only been 2 mins)

[iKod]

granted, but it's a post from an admin, to lock the post.


i wish i could watch the new south park episodes.

[Tom™]

Granted. But they changed there name to "North Store", meaning no new "South Park" episodes.

I wish Viacom exploded.

[SuperfastEon]

Granted. Unfortunately, you were there when it exploded, R.I.P.

I wish for a cookie:3

[ShiraBliss]

Granted, but the cookie is stale, and those aren't chocolate chips, my friend...

I wish I didn't need glasses >_>

[MzLuluZombi]

Granted. You are now blind to colour and moving vehicles.

I wish for the ability to speak Japanese.

[ZombieSteven]

Granted,but you only insult Japanese.
I wish my exams were over.

[Jarl ulfric stormcloak]

ganted, but tommoro they start again, and hader!

[Alexi: Crazier by the Day]

^You forgot to wish....

I wish I had a magic finger that makes it snow.

[ShiraBliss]

Granted, but whenever you use it you get fatally ill.

I wish for world peace 8D

[ZombieSteven]

Granted,but as a sacrifice for world peace,you are sacrificed.
I wish EV training became easy.

[MOP]

Granted but EVs become worthless.

I wish I had more fingers to type with.

[ShiraBliss]

Granted, but now you are totally off-putting and will never be in a relationship, hook-up, or even a one-night-stand ever again.

Also you keyboard explodes, making your wish useless :]

I wish for PIE