Make a Wish. Have it horribly corrupted.

[the bread dragon]

granted, shinyblaziken is your new waifu.

I wish for bigger hands.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. They are SO gigantic that you literally kill and break EVERYTHING you touch by simply putting your finger on stuff extremely lightly except yourself.

I wish it was Friday!

[Neotenens]

Granted, but from now on every day is monday.

I wish for endless knowledge.

[SirBlaziken]

Granted, but you never said on what. You are now filled with endless knowledge on the history of baby diapers (gotta love randomizers).

I wish for a wheel of fortune.

[Neotenens]

Granted, but the onlysections are death by exsanguination or disembowelment, or eternal life chained to a chair being forced to listen to boy bands. Have fun.

I wish for
|This wish cannot be corrupted., nor is it corrupt to begin with, nor can its status as pure be corrupted, or the previous clause about remaining pure being corrupted. Those who attempt to do so will have to answer to Phoenix Wright, who sadly does not exist, but that doesn't matter. Yet you still must find some way to corrupt this wish, and if you do without breaking the above, you will get a cupcake (note: you will not actually get a cupcake) and if you do break our terms, it means nothing, who cares, and you just wasted your time reading this pointless buildup to an easily corruptible wish|
A steak, and some mashed potatoes with green onions and extra butter.

[Petzbreeder]

Granted but you get food poisoning from eating it!
Your "terms" made no sense to me so therefore they are invalid!

I wish I could skip forward in time so I don't have to wait to get my modded 3DS.

[Delicious_Scout]

Granted, but your 3DS mysteriously asks you to film you whenever you are taking a shower.

I wish for something more broken than Mega Rayquaza.

[SirBlaziken]

Granted, you snap in half. Hey, that is what you asked..... right?

I wish that all the moving in our house was already done.

[E.C.A.M.B.S.]

Granted. I help you with it.

I wish I had a Misdreavus

[Neotenens]

Granted, but you are now allergic to ghosts.

I wish for more backstory on Zinnia.

[Captain Jigglypuff]

Granted. You are disappointed even more than before!

I wish you could catch Jirachi and Mew in the wild like you can with Deoxys.

[Neotenens]

Wish granted, but they can only learn splash.

[Petzbreeder]

Since Neotenens didn't make a wish, I'll make one

I wish my mum had an indoor voice and my ears were less sensitive (My ears are killing me today!)

[Neotenens]

Granted. You are now deaf.

I wish for a mech suit.

[Delicious_Scout]

Granted, but Hank Hill uses his propane barbeque to build a better one... for himself and Bobby, I tell you hwat!

I wish EVing and PokéAming a full team wasn't so tedious...